How to Handle Violent Children and Prevent Abusive Behavior
Know the Causes of Violence in Children toward Parents
Why are children violent?
Punching the door, slapping siblings, kicking an adult—it is difficult to imagine the nice little baby your child once was. Is there such thing as bad seeds, or are there people who were just really born violent?
Just like the color of our eyes, skin, and hair, violence has a lot to do with our DNA. However, there are also a number of contributing factors that could lead to developing violent behavior in children, like the child’s environment, the people he or she interacts with, and the media that the child is exposed to.
With all the factors that affect a person’s behavior, we can not necessarily say that people are just born that way. As a parent, there are a lot of things that you can do to prevent violence—and it is going to start in the four corners of your home. Tell your children that violence will not be tolerated and that they are going to face consequences, should they turn their aggression into violence.
Here are some tips to consider in dealing with violent, aggressive, and abusive behavior in children.
- Don’t give in to your child’s violence.
Children who are violent has turned into what they are today because they have found out they are gaining power by being violent, and so far, it has worked successfully. If your child is getting the shortcut to power through being violent, take that power away from him. Do not let any form of violence slide because if young children ages five, six, or seven are acting aggressively, there is going to be a fat chance that they are going to turn into violent teens or adults.
- Eliminate aggressive and violent media from the house.
Exclude all violent children shows, movies, music, videos, and games from your home. Don’t give the kids the idea that violence and aggression are glamorized in your family. Children are keen observers and if they are constantly exposed to aggressive and violent media then don’t be surprised if you children start mimicking what they see.
- Form a healthy bond with your children.
Studies show that children need five caring adults for them to grow up healthy and happy, so make sure that your children are surrounded by people who care for them. Aside from parents, and other family members such as aunts, uncles, grandparents can act as positive role models to your children. Don’t make your children feel isolated. Always encourage compassionate, ethical, and kind individuals to be part in your children’s lives.
- Teach your children calming techniques.
Violence is the end product of aggression, but take note that not all aggressive children become violent. A violent child is one who still hasn’t learned any other strategy to solve his or her problem other than striking out onto anything or anybody. Teach your children the best strategies to chill out when they are upset. Working with violent children is about demonstrating your own coping and problem-solving strategies. By no means is it encouraged to hide your feelings or act tough. Our aim is to teach your child how to handle conflict in his or her own life without the use of violence.
- Be a positive role model.
If you or your partner are hurting each other or the children, it is only normal that your kids will jump on the bandwagon. If you find that your child is turning into a violent kid or teenager, don’t punish them harshly. When parents are abusive, insensitive, or violent to their children, the parents are leading them by example. As parents, guardians, and caretakers, we must foster our own faith and compassion in our children’s goodness.